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“Well, if he’s just a friend and you trust him, I’ll trust you.” But I could tell she had never even considered the possibility that my girlfriends were anything more than friends. I identified as bisexual at the time, and she knew it. “You realize I could be sleeping with my girlfriends when they spend the night, right?” I remember asking her. That’s the logic I used when I asked my mother at 15 to have a good friend who happened to be male sleep over. More: Why I take my son to feed the homeless twice a month It’s either no one can spend the night, or everyone can. If I am worried about boys, I should be equally worried about girls.
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It would be completely irresponsible of me to ignore the possibility that my daughter isn’t heterosexual. If my daughter were to engage in unsafe sex with a person of any gender, she could contract an STD or STI. Not from pregnancy, or the other potential consequences of unsafe sex. And I remember not being the exception - almost all of my friends were having sex.īanning boys from spending the night wouldn’t have prevented my teen pregnancy. I remember the sex in parked cars, the park and garages. I remember taking advantage of my boyfriend’s parents being at work. I remember a dark moonlit bedroom not being a requirement for fooling around. I know this because I remember being a teen. If they want to have sex, they’ll find a way. I want her to wait until she’s ready to experience motherhood on her own terms, until she’s lived life for herself at least a little bit.īut I know that trying to keep teens from having sex is impossible. Certainly, I don’t want her to go through what I did as a teen mom. You’d think the experience of being a teen mom would make me want to keep all boys at least 10 feet away from my daughter, or at least ban boys from her room.
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More: Masturbating is totally normal for everyone… but not my son This time I did it in her house, and my heart was still racing from the excitement. I probably could’ve just told her the truth, like I had many times before, but this time was different from the rest. She had known for quite some time that I was sexually active. I was usually pretty open about my sex life with her. “No, we weren’t,” I tried to assure her, but I doubt she believed me. My mother was blasting Al Green like she did every Sunday when she cleaned the house.